‘Ya think that Rachel is getting really tired of all the slut bashing???
An nice excerpt:
I do think examining why cultural trends occur is important, but at the end of the day, you either want people to make decisions for themselves or you don’t. Part of accepting the responsibility of freedom, autonomy and maturity is allowing women, and men, to make both “good” and “bad” choices for themselves. I could do without the judgment of those choices, but okay, fine, judge them-but how on earth can you say “liberation” means “freedom to do as we please” and then immediately afterward decry some of the things that please some women? It’s a catch-22 that to me negates the very meaning of feminism as I know it.
And to defend my own job for a moment, in my magazine, we explore ALL KINDS of fetishes and fantasies. It is in no way a freaking monoculture, in fact, the very opposite. I have learned so much about the various forms human sexuality takes and am always fascinated to learn about more. I think it’s a very, very narrow view of the world and sex and bodies and fantasies to see it the way she does. I feel that SEXUAL FREEDOM can only happen when we are not trying to be liberated from each other, but when we learn to encompass those whose sexualities are in the minority, who are looking to claim their place in the sexual arena, anad if they don’t see themselves reflected, they create their own smut reflecting their desires. But “freedom” is not a word that means “freedom to fuck the way I want you to” – at least, it shouldn’t be. Just as free speech does not mean only speech you agree with, sexual freedom, true freedom, cannot mean the freedom to only engage in nice, safe, perfect, pretty, simple, easy, 100% equal, nothing tying it to the real world sex. Because in real life, sex is messy and complicated and we work things out through sex that may have to do with all sorts of things other than direct physical arousal. It’s about our brains and our bodies, about the convergence of the two, and if for some people that means stripping and fucking on film and blogging and being slutty and wild and whatever else these scolds disapprove of, then so be it. I would rather renounce being a feminist and stand in favor of sexual freedom than have to be some toe-the-line feminist constantly asking the sex police if the way I want to fuck is okay.
Actually, Rachel, you shouldn’t have to even make that decision, since those who attempt to police sexual thought and action aren’t really legitimate feminists to me…..but a standing ovation to you for saying what has to be said on the rest.
A few more women speaking out like that, and I might not feel so lonely here.